Empowerment Part 6 Resolving the Incongruence

This may seem unrelated to empowerment but I believe it is fundamental to the whole subject.

Is it just me or is there an inherent incongruence or contradiction in church life? We talk about being "little Christ's" to our neighbor as Luther did and to live out our vocation whatever station in life. We agree with Luther on the "priesthood of all believers" and many other fine teachings of the reformation, including justification and the related teaching of John 3:16, the Missio Dei and the Great Commission. Yet in the church we find professional clergy who often default as the deliverers of spiritual goods and services and the members, many of whom are believing they are faithful in simply coming to worship and being on the receiving end of those spiritual goods and services. Overstating things? Perhaps. Yet even if we reject that characterization of the church as false, clergy and laity, in the living out of those roles week after week will have its cumulative effect on us. Over time, people will more and more be entrenched in sitting and receiving and clergy will more and more be compelled to lead worship, Bible classes and visit ever more faithfully as that is the apparent expectation of each.

Well then the question becomes for us: is it really Biblical? Is it what we say we believe, teach and confess? Probably not. Yet the "consumer spirituality" and the "professional clergy, provider" roles seem to reflect what we are living out. Unspoken expectations? Yes, perhaps. Contrary to what we "speak" or even "proclaim"? Yes, most likely. So we have a contradiction or seeming incongruence going on.

So what to do?
Three options seem to be available to us.
The first is to do nothing. Live with the tension between what we do and what we teach or say we teach.

The second is to make the adjustment in the doctrinal department. Diminish the role of the laity, subtly tell them they are not qualified to evangelize or do real ministry and at the same time elevate the clergy to a high status that honors them as the sole providers of the spiritual gifts contained in the Word and Sacraments. This would resolve the tension between what is taught historically and biblically and how we, in many cases behave, or live out our faith as church members. I would say that some are leaning into this solution for the incongruence even though it is in discontinuity with Luther and the Scriptures, even if they assert that the opposite is the case. Laity like it because it relieves them of the burden of living more fully into being a disciple of Jesus and clergy like it because it elevates their role and importance. It is comfortable on both counts.

The third way is to correct in the behavioral department. Elevate the role of the laity back to what is taught in the Bible. "A chosen people, a royal priesthood, a holy nation,  a people belonging to God" and so on (1 Peter 2:9ff. and Eph 4 etc). Re-empower them to serve in real ministry that serves people with the gospel according to their vocation, station and calling in life. Remind them that they are the salt of the earth that ought not lose its saltiness (Matt 5). Then as clergy preach, teach and live according to what the Bible says about the role of clergy, who do not do it all but "equip the saints for the work of diaconia/ministry" (Eph 4:12) and honor others as having valuable spiritual gifts for the sake of the kingdom of God and the mission of God (1 Cor 12; Rom 12 etc.). This is not the easy path but it is the correct option in my humble opinion. It requires repentance and new behaviors. For clergy it requires saying "no" to certain spoken or unspoken expectations that may feel like failure and may meet with resistance and passionate disapproval of many people. It will re-introduce to both clergy and laity the appropriate guilt of failing to live out our role as followers of Jesus or disciples. That is not fun. But it will resolve the tension between the incongruence of what the Bible teaches and what we expect of one another. And the result will also, by the grace of God working through the means of grace, even and especially through the laity, bring many more people to Jesus.

Coaching Questions:

• How are you and your church living out the Biblical patterns of church and discipleship (notice I did not say "membership"?)
• Where is the incongruence for you and your church? How can you address that incongruence?
• Where does there need to be repentance? Where does there need to be grace and forgiveness?
• What can you pray for? What can you praise God for? What is God's role in this?

Empowering Leaders Part 5

When we are born our parents tell us what to do.

When we go to school our teachers tell us what to do.

When we get a job our bosses tell us what to do.

When we enter a position of responsibility we think we need to tell people what to do.

How’s that working for you?

Probably not that great. When people get told what to do they react in a few different ways. Some jump in and do it. They are rare. Some resist and like a little child told to eat their vegetables they say “NO” in response to being told (Reminds one of Romans 7:8 as a reaction to the Law). Some will do it reluctantly but resent the being told part. Some do it happily knowing that if it fails or goes south they can blame you and say, “I was just doing what I was told.” Some do it happily but with a sense of ignorance and then the next time they come running to you because you have created a dependence upon you. Now doesn't that feel good? No. That feels dysfunctional.

Now why do you do that? Do what?

Why do you take responsibility away from others? Or put another way, why do you steal the power from them that rightly belongs to them anyway? Why do we relieve people of thinking and insist on doing it for them? Is it because we think we are so much smarter than they are? What's up with that?

Empowerment presumes you have the power to give it away to others. But as I was reminded recently non-empowerment is really stealing the power that belongs to them in the first place. Do you feel powerful when you “tell” people what to do? Do you use the excuse that it won’t get done right unless you do it or tell others what to do? Again, how’s that working for you? People who are told what to do often do it with half the passion and energy than if it was their idea or done on their initiative. 

If you want to develop people:

• Stop talking – start listening
• Stop telling – start asking - it gets them thinking
• Stop solving problems for people – start creating awareness within people- it will lead them to take responsibility and live into the appropriate action
• Stop making it happen – start facilitating their action

Coaching questions:

• What is getting in the way of you doing any of the above?
• What are you getting out of not doing it?
• What are you sacrificing?
• What will you do now?

We have all we need in Christ through our baptism. We don't need to build our esteem off of the task or accomplishment or "lording it over" others.

Test your assumptions for one week of new behaviors. Evaluate the results with a coach. Have the courage to make the adjustment toward new behaviors and new thinking. Rejoice in who you are already in Christ.

Empowering Leaders Part 4

A number of years ago I learned from then FLGA District Mission Executive, Jerry Seaman that there are three ingredients to expanding the number of people serving the Lord in meaningful ways. I don’t think we called it empowerment back then but it made a lot of sense and it shaped my thinking ever since. It was a simple formula but powerful if you actually put it into practice:

1.  Give people meaningful things to do.
2. Support and help them along the way.
3. Celebrate the results.

Sound too simplistic? Well it is simple, but not easy. Let’s look at them one by one.

1. Give people meaningful things to do. Meaningful to whom? To them! People are not satisfied with folding bulletins. They want to make a difference in people’s lives. Interview them (see above, part 3) and find out what that means to them. Then give them the opportunity and don’t get in the way. In fact, get out of the way! (Was that too strong?) But I’m not in the way! Are you sure? Check again. You are perfectly designed to get what you are getting. So if people are not engaged and growing, “Houston we have a problem.” Change begins with you.

2. Support and help them along the way. People are reluctant to step up because they don’t want to look foolish in front of their peers and/or they don’t want to fumble the ball when it comes to serving the Lord. They also know that often they feel like they have a target on their back in the church when they try to do something. Too often in the church our actions toward servant leaders feels like dumping it on them and sending the message – “sink or swim” it’s now on you. I wouldn’t step up in that environment either. So counter that by creating a culture of support and help. This is servant leadership at its core that constantly asks, “How is it going and how can I help?” While at the same time not taking the responsibility from them. Why? Because you believe in them! You believe that God has created them with great capacity to do great things! Keep in touch, call them, write an encouraging note, stop them at church, and be interested in their success for their sake – even when from your perspective it is a small thing. See what happens!

3. Celebrate the results. This is one area I would miss. I would often be looking down the road at the next thing but had to learn that celebration is crucial, even when things went bad. That’s where debriefing comes in. What worked, what didn’t, what did we learn, how can we improve next time? But celebration is crucial even when things go well. Stop and smell the roses! Rejoice at what God has done through even you and especially the laity! Thank them! Give God the praise. After all, God did it anyway, right?

Coaching Questions:

• Which of these steps do you already do?
• Where do you need to grow and be more intentional?
• How well do you “give away the ministry”?
• How can you put into use the three steps? Who, what, when, how? Name it.
• What’s stopping you? How will you overcome that barrier?
• Celebrate the results with God!

Empowering Leaders Part 3

Ministry doesn't have to
feel like you are spinning
plates all by yourself

So, how are you leading yourself? How clear are you regarding the mission and your place in the mission? Tired of plate spinning? Are you ready to engage others? Exactly how will you do that?

I know you may feel impatient and in a rush to get the task done but it’s not about the task is it? It is about growing people. Begin by getting to know people. What are their passions? Rather than pigeonhole people to fill in your gaps in what you want done, or try to put them on the ministry or discipleship merry-go-round, ask them what passions the Lord has given them? Co-create something or somewhere where they can explore and step into that which ignites their passions all the more and serves the greater kingdom of God all the while being aligned with the mission and vision.

What’s the ministry or discipleship merry-go-round you ask? Well, that’s when you tell them to attend worship and Bible class and “just get involved” in hopes that at the end out will come a fully formed disciple. It might come out of an “I don’t want to be pushy” concern, it might come from a “this approach has worked for centuries” kind of thinking, and it might come from a “I don’t really know how else to do it” place. Yet isn’t that the reality? We hope people will find their way and over time maturity in serving and being a disciple will happen spontaneously or it will rub off on them from some of the other members/disciples. But how is that working for ya? Not too well I presume. It is a merry-go-round because it doesn't get you very far. The real answer is being intentional with Christ followers.

That means customization vs. the cattle call of “ya’ll come” to this or that program or activity. It is a new approach. It is more work. After all, people are people and not functionaries. Spend time with them. Get to know them. Honor them and the gifts God has given them. Don’t see any? Keep looking, keep talking, and keep asking. If God has them in the body of Christ, no doubt there is a valuable place for them. Their gifts and passions may not seem valuable to you and your point of view, but no doubt they are valuable to God and a kingdom point of view. When that gets named and honored in people, growth begins to soar. The ministry multiplies. People are empowered. More come to faith in Jesus.

I like Reggie McNeal’s story of one church told in his book Missional Renaissance (pp. 123ff). He speaks of intentional interviews with people. What do you enjoy doing? Where do you see God at work right now? What would you like to see God do in your life over the next six to twelve months? How would you like to serve other people? How can I help? How can I pray for you? Perhaps I like it so much because it looks a lot like coaching which is my passion.

Yes it means a whole different approach. Yes it means some vacancies will continue to exist in current ministry structures (but don’t you have those anyway?). And yes it may even mean that the structure and how and what you do will shift, maybe even dramatically. But if it means more people engaged in kingdom work and growing as disciples, then that is a sacrifice worth taking.

Empowering Leaders Part 2

Are you under the gun to make the project happen? Are you caught up in the press to produce? Does that make you too busy to identify and cultivate new leaders? What do you want more?

In the short term you feel the need to accomplish the task but you know you can’t keep this up for the long haul. You may believe that you are the best one to do it but if no one else ever gets involved then no one will learn. On top of that, you know in your heart that being the chief doer on whom people depend isn’t the best way to do things - for yourself, for other people, or for the long-term viability of the ministry or organization.

The hard truth:

Certainly there are priorities that have deadlines and you are the one who by default has to make sure it happens. Yet we are not nearly the victims of our circumstances that we like to complain that we are. The present reality that you have is exactly what you are currently producing! So what are you doing, intentionally or unintentionally as the leader, to produce what you are getting? Want to quit? Go somewhere else? Seeking to leave and serve somewhere else will not change the “you” that was a vital ingredient in producing your uncomfortable circumstances. No, the change has to begin with you. Nothing will change unless you change. Besides, the only one you have control over is yourself. Sometimes even that is sketchy! Nevertheless, your focus needs to be taking responsibility for leading yourself.

So how and where do I start?

Have you experienced “mission drift”? It may sound basic but often where you start is taking the time and effort to become really clear about who you are with your strengths and gifts and role, clear about your mission, and then prioritizing what you do. It may sound basic but it is hard work to do it well.

An exercise that helps:

One exercise that helps is to list everything that you do. Everything. Then write down who you are along with your mission or purpose and the dream or vision of where you and your organization would like to be some day. Next, divide a piece of paper into four parts labeled with the following four categories:

1. Urgent & Important
2. Urgent & Not Important
3. Not Urgent but Important
4. Not Urgent and Not Important

Now put everything that you do into one of the four categories based upon who you are and your clear mission and vision.

Now ask yourself:

After you have done this to the best of your ability, what did you discover? What sticks out for you? What did you learn? What new awarenesses are coming to you? What next steps are you going to take? How are you going to be different? What are you going to do more of? What are you going to do less of?

Make the tough choices and create some margin in your life. Intentionally decide what you will do and not do. Now you may finally be in a good position to begin to empower others.

In part one and now in part two, perhaps you noticed that the questions are asked of you, the leader. That is intentional. Empowering others begins with leading yourself well. (Would you follow you as a leader? Why or why not? Oops – that’s for another blog entry…)

Empowering Leaders Part 1

Pastors and churches are always clamoring for leaders. “I can’t get anyone to do anything. “We need leaders.” “How do I train leaders?” “It’s hard to get people to join boards or committees.”

Have you heard this stuff before? Right. Now what do we do?

First, while there are many very helpful definitions for leadership, at it’s core though, leadership is about taking responsibility and creating change. I often provide the book, Leadership Coaching by Tony Stoltzfus when I lead coach training events. Stoltzfus says, “A leader is someone who sees a problem and says, ‘someone needs to do something about that, and I’m that someone.’” In this way they enter into a leadership posture. They are taking responsibility. Also related to this is the truth that the capacity that someone has for leadership is directly related to their capacity to take responsibility. Notice this has nothing to do with positional power. Notice also that taking responsibility, no matter how small, is the starting place. From there people grow in taking larger and larger portions of responsibility. We see it all the time as people are promoted at work or even as children grow from infants to adulthood and move out on their own.

So a critical place to start in empowering others is by asking ourselves some very simple yet profound questions:

• What am I doing that takes responsibility away from people? (Are you sure? Think about that again. A related question is: How am I creating a dependency upon me? Why or why not? What am I getting out of that? What's that about?)
• What can I do to introduce people to noticing problems? (Does that make you squirm? Why or why not?!)
• What can I do to help people to take responsibility for those problems? (What just happened inside of you when you read that one? What was that about?)
• How can I find, invent, create, small first step places for people to take responsibility?
• How can I best support people who take on these responsibilities, however small?
• How can I help them without relieving them of the responsibility?
• How can I celebrate the results of what they have done, no matter the outcome?

How you answer these questions and what you actually do will have tremendous ramifications.

Why a blog?

When a coach is at their best as a coach, they help people to change without telling them what to do. When I train coaches I stress this very much, because the default for many of us, who want to help others, is to tell them what to do. That means that a good coach will self-manage their inclinations to tell people what to do and instead ask a lot of good questions. Good questions mean being self-aware and not asking leading questions or making statements that are in the form of questions.

That doesn't mean though that I have nothing to say. Over the course of the last few years of coaching and even more years of pastoral ministry I have come to some thoughts and determinations about coaching, leadership, ministry, revitalizing congregations and so on. I wondered if there was any value in letting those thoughts fly and inviting people to dialogue about them. The goal would be another venue for exploring, learning, affirming and growing in effectiveness to the glory of God.

So this isn't the final word of course, but my prayer is that it will be helpful in "moving the ball down the field" for growth and productivity in coaching, leadership, ministry, revitalization and missional living.